In case you didn’t know this about me…I used to be an OVER-DOER. Over-analyze, over-apologize, overly-prove, overly- be nice, overly-worry, and not only that, but I was proud of this ability!
My favorites were over-analyzing people and experiences. It helped me to make sense of what happened or see if it was a safe relationship/job/trip/etc. I gave this a lot of attention, and it became a skill that I thought I could depend on.
I thought it was a positive skill set and I thrived on the sense of security and safety it gave me. Because I knew I had done my best or I had figured something out or I had learned or grown myself. This created a little nest for me until…
I realized it wasn’t coming from a good place. It was coming from a dark place of fear and perfection. It was creating more obsessive thinking and I didn’t feel TRUE PEACE as a result. I felt tired, I felt let down, I felt like I now had a reason to blame myself or others, I felt “in my head”, and I couldn’t relax.
The more I practiced my inner work and delved into healing, the less I wanted to use my mind and OVER- DO anything. It became a problem as I wanted quiet and trust. I no longer wanted the illusion of perfection or safety; I wanted a truer version of authentic life. To come into alignment, I had to let go of the habit to “over-do” and dig deeper into healing my fears.
I began to see the difference between my ego trying to provide safety and love from outside myself (over-doing) and having a rich inner world that provided safety and love from deep within myself. I began to embrace and accept what was present and learn from it without jumping into my monkey brain and figuring it all out or fixing it.
This is the work I do with my one-on-one clients. This is the work that has changed my life. I no longer depend on my mind to figure things out, I turn inwards, and I soothe my fears and I love myself through the hard times. I quiet my mind and let my soul guide me forward.
As a result, my mind is quieter, my heart is accepting of myself, others and the world and I don’t depend on “over-doing” in order to feel safe or loved.
